So your friend just had a break up, few weeks ago? And he is completely fine. Or do you think he is drifting? These are few questions that kind of revolve in our heads whenever we see our friend getting out of a serious relationship. He says he is okay, of course. So much so that you actually consider if it is a good idea to finally ask him out on a date. You have waited so long after all. But something is bothering you. Something seems off, doesn’t it? He laughs too hard and seems to be trying harder and harder to have fun. Almost as if he doesn’t want anyone to notice when he goes silent at times. He zones out often and when you ask him about it, he says it’s nothing. But is it really nothing? Or is he still hung up on that lover who broke his heart into pieces?
Well, if you are not sure it is actually happening, here are some signs that the guy is not over his ex yet:
1. He tries to steer his conversation away from the ex
It could be possible that you all are sitting around a fire, talking some old memories which involved his ex. He would try and bring a stop to this conversation or just say “Can we not talk about this please? We have literally talked about this tons of times before” and, in case he finds this too rude, he might give a polite excuse to leave your company for a while. It is just that he knows if he hears or talks about her too much, the feelings will come drifting back.
2. Several rebound relationships
When someone tries to suppress their feelings for their ex, they end up releasing those emotions for a completely different person whom they are actually substituting for their ex. This is not very healthy as they are trashing about with their emotions and wasting their own time and also others’. This can also hurt the person who he is in a relationship with, who probably doesn’t even realise that she could be a rebound.
3. He talks about his ex too much
Okay, this is in stark contrast to the first point but bear with me. He talks about them too much when he is actually on a proper date. This could be a potential relationship but he is kind of ruining that. Well, this clearly shows that he isn’t over his ex yet.
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4. He is still in touch with his ex
This is surely a clear sign and hint. There is still a part of him that wants to get back together with his ex and that’s why he keeps texting them in a frenzy of hope. This is weird considering that exes generally don’t stay good friends. Once you see this happening, do sit up and take notice. For people who are dating such a person, this is a potential relationship spoiler on what could be coming next.
5. He seems greatly annoyed if the ex is seeing someone
Sure, initially he seems to be composed and does say things like “oh okay, good for her” but inside he feels like tearing her guts out. It hurts him. He makes sure to know every detail about his ex’s current relationship. Maybe he will churn it over and over in his mind, so as to believe it himself.
6. He somehow always ends up crossing her on the street or randomly meeting somewhere
Stalker Alert! The thing is, he might be quite obsessed with the idea that if his ex keeps seeing him, it might remind her of what they had and they may get back together. Of course, the said ex might not feel that way at all and might just find it creepy because he keeps going back to her house to “return some stuff”. Or maybe he knows her routine quite well to end up in the same place as her at some particular time in the week. If this is happening, it has gone too far and it is time you step in.
7. He still has all the pictures
This is a little clichéd but true. Guys tend not to have pictures from previous relationships. However, if he still does, then it is a clear message that he still craves for his ex’s presence. And that is why he keeps scrolling these images late into the night. Sometimes there may be some hidden tears involved. After all, it was a genuine and precious relationship they had and he lost it.
Well, there goes the list. So, if you know someone among your friends who is going through similar stuff like this, be sure not to leave their side. Make them see reason and console them. Who knows, he might finally be able to see that you have always been there for him, and things might turn just the way you have wanted to.