It was two years ago. I went on vacation with a friend, did not plan anything like that and ... fell in love. We lived in the same hotel with the company of guys. Naturally, we met, started to go on trips together, walk to the sea, spend evenings. At first they just talked with the company, all the adults were decent, nothing out of the ordinary was there. Had fun, talked and talked a lot. My girlfriend is a practicing English teacher, I am a graduate student. There was something to talk about, especially since the men were also educated and well-read.
One of them immediately caught my attention, since our views on certain things coincided very well. Sasha did not hide that he was married, and I immediately made it clear that I don’t even want to get involved with a married man, but the film “Love and Doves” is the most beloved since childhood. But he surrounded me with attention, care, followed me everywhere, and I gave up.
Until now, I think that was my biggest mistake. Conscience hurts, despite how much time has passed.
At first they just talked. Sasha immediately made it clear to his friends that he has species for me, and, although I said that there would be nothing, he did not give up. Constantly circling around me, paying a lot of attention, caring in the genre of classical melodrama - organized interesting entertainment, gave flowers, made it clear that my comfort is very important to him. I tried not to attach much importance to this, but how can I not melt it when it is so courteous and, what a sin to confess, attractive?
I realized that I give up at the beginning of the second week of rest. We were on the beach, all in the same company, and Sasha sat next to me. I always kept my distance, but at that moment he sat very close, behind me, he smelled good, and he constantly tried to touch me. Alcohol and a pleasant evening gave their result - at night, when everyone had left, we stayed on the beach and kissed until the morning, until it was light. So it all began.
Now, remembering the week and a half that we had left, I do not regret anything, despite the torments of conscience. Driving around, they both cried, as if they had met the love of their whole life, and after a few more months they called each other, every day less and less, until the communication had come to naught.
The problem is that I can not forget it. After Sasha, there were men on my way, but each of them seemed different, I compared each of them with Sasha, and after making sure that he did not look like - he pushed away. It exhausted me, because I know that he lives perfectly his own life, with his family, and I ... These feelings, which do not pass, frighten me.
Perhaps the whole point is that before I had never experienced anything like this, that I had never had such spontaneous but vivid relationships. I hope that soon I will learn not to compare all men with Sasha and not to look for his features in them, but so far nothing has come of it.